30wks n 2days: a mother's love

I'm warded with 3 other mummies. 1 had a smooth natural delivery. Another had a c section too but I think baby is upstairs at nicu I'm nt too sure why. Another mummy... Well she's the reason why I'm writing this post. 

She has 2 kids... Elder one a boy who is in primary skool. The 2nd a girl in child care. She had a 3rd child. But unfortunately lost her life at week 25. And now she's pregnant with baby number 4. It's a boy. All her children are preemies. It's Becuz she suffers frm preeclampsia (the one fourfeetnine) suffered from too. She's currently 26weeks n fighting to keep baby number 4 in as long as she can. Baby number 4 is onli 500g... N he's not getting enough nutrients from mummy cuz thrs something wrong wif her placenta. So for baby to put on weight it's veri difficult. 

Preeclampsia is a condition caused by high blood pressure. U swell up so badly... Ur body can go into a stroke if ur blood pressure is too high.. Basically it's dangerous for both mummy and baby. But she's such an optimistic mummy. I can't imagine what she's going through right nw. But I noe she puts baby number 4 be4 her own life first. 

I hav such respect for her courage and selflessly. And she has given me such hope whenever I see her both once preemie children running up n down the ward. She has the experience with such children n I'm glad I was able to hear her story. This realli comforts me a lot whenever I get worried over baby Gwyn. I guess when u become a mother... Ur child becomes ur top priority. Everything else doesn't matter. 

Before I was wheeled in to surgery.. My husband took my hand n told me "if anything would happen and I hav to decide if it's baby or u... U noe who I will pick rite?" We had this convo many yrs be4 while we were dating. To him nth is more important than my life. He said if I died Becuz of child labour it would be meaningless to bring up a child wifout his/her mother n he would resent the child. Praise The Lord no complications happened n we both made it. But deep down I always knew I would pick baby over me. I carried this life in me for 7mths (supposedly 10mths). I suffered so much n to come out wif nth at the end of the day I would be so devastated. So idk n dun wanna noe wat it feels like to lose a child. Cuz I would probably go into depression n then die. 

This is a mother's love and sacrifice. Something I finally understand myself n I thank The Lord for blessing me with a forgiving, loving, selfless n amazing mum. I hope to be jus as amazing as her too.