A mother's rant

Anyways gonna rant nw. So my husband has been realli great! He's realli a hands on father. N he's been off frm work/ gg in later than usual for the past few wks since baby gwyn came home. So both of us would wake up during the midnight shifts frm Sunday to Wednesday (when we are at his place) n frm thurs to Saturday at my place when my dad is away on biz trip she would sleep wif my mummy so she wakes up n let's us sleep through. 

Today he finally went back to work during his normal time which left me doing the mid night shift. I got realli mad this morning Becuz his place is a double storey house n always has many weird surprises for me (lizards, cockroaches) so I get realli scared coming down alone to prep her milk n all. So this morning I was left alone to come down n prep her milk n feed her. I wanted to kill him cuz I was fatigued, cranky n annoyed at having to come all the way downstairs. But baby gwyn suddenly woke up while I was prepping her milk n she was in such a gd mood smiling away n all... It made waking up so worth it! Like I was realli cranky n tired I could punch someone but seeing her smile was so satisfying. 

N then it dawned on me... Hw the hell do the full time working mums who breast feed n hav premature babies do it!!!!??? If u think abt it... Mums who give birth to premature babies start their confinement n maternity leave frm the day they give birth. But u see their baby isn't home wif them yet. So wait another 2-3mths then baby comes home mostly by their due date. So u calculate their age frm their due date n they are jus a few days/weeks old when these mummies hav to go back to work! Which means these babies still wake up every 3-4hrs in the nite n these mummies hav to wake up n feed them. Like hw the hell do they do it!?

A typical day of mine: 

My last pump session is frm 12-2am 

Her last feeding session is also around tt time which daddy would feed 

Then I head to bed 

If we are lucky we can sleep through a gd 6hr... If nt she cries after 2-4hrs 

If daddy wakes up.. He feeds her n I will pump. If nt I will feed her n then pump after 

She has been waking up at 4am n won't sleep till 7 so I hav to entertain her. I normally sing to her/do tummy time or if I'm realli tired lie her on my tummy n try to put her to sleep. 

N then it starts again... 3-6hrs wake up n feed/pump

Bathe her around the afternoon 

N then feed again. 

I'm so sleep deprived it's nt funni!! But yea as I said it's satisfying when I see her all happy. I will do anything for this lil angel of mine (: 

I'm veri incoherent wif my thots nw. Haha pumping nw n baby is crying. So gdbye for nw!