Marriage talk: MBS?

I've been wanting to blog about this for a while. But I've been busy settling school stuff and nursing a bad flu and cough. Baby.. Husband.. Grandma and I are all down with the same virus -.-

Sean and I live at both our parents house. On Sunday nights we go back to his side... Thursday my mum comes and pick G and I up and we head back to mine. But because my place is further to Sean's work place.. He doesn't come back till Friday which gives us 1 day apart from each other. There are days where G and I stay on Sunday nights and only go back on Monday. So sometimes we have 2 or more days apart. One day sean asked me "is this good for our marriage?"

Well there are 2 outcomes of it... 1 it makes a couple still miss each other. Another they grow further apart cause of too much personal space. For us, we've been doing this for a year and over now. What I've realized is that it makes us miss each other more. Like sean will always message me to tell me how he misses his girls when we aren't at home. And because G still wakes up in the middle of the night, sean is very exhausted and he has to work too. So I give him one day to sleep through and rest properly. And when we are there he's not able to "enjoy his shrimp hobby" cause we "disturb" him. So on Thursday night he gets time alone for himself.

While some "old school" people may not agree with our arrangement, it works for us. At first I thought it was weird too. But our parents accept it and then I realize we aren't the only couple! A lot of young married couples who are waiting for their BTOs to be ready actually have such arrangements too. Mainly because of distance from work that they choose to stay at their own homes and only stay together during the weekends.

To me how I look at it for the next 3-4 years while waiting for our house, we can afford to this now. When we move in to our house, its for real. We are stuck together for life! Haha and I'm super close to my family so any chance I get to live back at my own house I definitely will. And they love having G with them too.

And thing is at my own house I can chuck G with my mum in the middle of the night if I'm too tired to deal with her. But at Sean's I'm really on my own since sean has work. I can't be knocking on my in laws room at 3am right? So yea I feel more uncomfy at my own home.

To me even though you are married, you mustnt lose your personal identity. As an individual you still need to have your own personal space to do whatever you want without your spouse. So for us, we have one day apart to do that.

I guess this is what we call a modern marriage. The younger generation has adopted this style of marriage. It may work for some or it may not. Whatever it is marriage is about compromise, open communication and coming up with what works for you guys as a couple. There aren't set rules on how to maintain a marriage. Its finding what works together as a couple.